Women using me for sex

Dear Pastor,

I’m a 24-year-old man and I am having a serious problem; a very big one. It is a thing where I think I am getting used sexually by females and I really don’t like it. When I say used, I mean that all I gain from these females is sex. It doesn’t matter how hard I try to stay away from these situations, it only seems to be getting worse. Every female I see for the first time it always happens to become a sexual interaction, and I hate it because I am searching for a female to settle down with, one with whom I can have my first child. But I don’t know if that will happen.

I can’t live this way but most of these women keep telling me the same thing. They all say that I have a good personality and they enjoy having sex with me. However, they don’t know if that’s what I’m looking for.

I am stressed about this situation because my mom told me she wants a grandchild from me because I’m getting older. I’m not so financially stable, so if a child were to enter this world by me, my relatives would help me to take care of it.

However, they don’t know that I’m facing a hard time finding a girl and getting her pregnant. As I said before, this is because every time a female meets me, we always end up having sex and that is all. Most times I wasn’t ready to have sex with them at the level of the relationship, but it just happened. I think about this every night.

What makes me feel so bad is I have good intentions for every female, so I don’t know if it is the way I talk to them about a better life and the future, and motivate them. It turns out to be love. And, the worst part of this is I never get the chance to go on a date with a girl. It’s just sex, sex, sex!

I need help from you. You need to tell me what to do. So many situations happen where more than one girl told me that I’m attractive but I don’t see that. Even last year one of my female cousins texted me and told me the same thing. She said that I was attractive and she started to send me explicit videos and pictures. She said she wants to have sex with me because she has liked me for a long time. However, I havent had sex with her. I don’t know, but it is like my life is just all about sex. I told other females who are my friends about this and all they do is just laugh and say, ‘You are young so enjoy your young life’. I don’t know what to say. Honestly, it has reached a point that I don’t take relationships seriously any more because this keeps happening over and over. Please let me know what to do, please.

P.W.

Dear P.W.,

It is clear to me is either that you are infertile or that you always use a condom when you are having sex with these many women. If you were in a position to impregnate women, you would have many children. Perhaps, you have been very careful. These are not women who you would want to establish long lasting relationships with; you are probably buying sex from prostitutes.

You have written to me trying to be smart, but you cannot fool me. You have not told me the whole truth. You have your sexual budget. You know how much money you want to spend on women and that is what you are probably doing. You don’t really want to settle down. You are looking for another girl, and I am not going to allow you to use my column to find that woman.

I can refer you to see a psychologist. You said one of your female cousins suggested that both of you should go to bed. Perhaps she wants to get money out of you too. If you would love for me to send you the name and address of a psychologist please contact me at 876-877-1009. Right now, however, I see you as a trickster. I will be willing to apologise to you if I am wrong.

Pastor